That’s All, Folks (the last post)

We fly back to the States tomorrow, and I have very mixed emotions. On the one hand, I think I’m ready to come home: I miss friends and family, can’t wait to pick Daniel up from camp, need to get my house in order, and am very eager to get back to work. It’s been a long time. On the other hand, I will miss Japan very, very much, although I think David is probably correct when he says it’s really Tokyo I’ll miss. He means that I’m a city girl, and I’ve absolutely adored living in a big city again. It does help to know we’ll be moving from Mississippi to New Jersey soon, and I’ll have regular access to Manhattan again.

The four-month stay in Japan has changed me somewhat, in both deep and superficial ways.

On the superficial level, here are some Japanese customs I’ve (temporarily) adopted:

* I automatically take my shoes off when I come into a house, and use separate slippers in the bathroom.

* I bow instead of shaking hands (and I have perfected three different “depths” of bow, depending on who I am addressing).

* I am very adept with chopsticks.

* I refill other people’s glasses at the table, and not my own.

* I place my money in a tray rather than hand it directly to a salesclerk when shopping.

* I walk on the left side (of sidewalks, escalators, etc.).

* I carry a small washcloth in my purse at all times, since many public restrooms don’t provide paper towels or hand dryers.

But there are more fundamental changes as well. I think I’ve changed my aesthetic sense a bit, and will have to get used to a Western sensibility again (although honestly I don’t think it will take long). I’ve also changed my idea of how well it’s possible for millions of people to live together in a big city. And I’ve changed my global perspective, my view of where the U.S. stands in the world, because as I’ve said before, this is the first place I’ve ever been that makes my home country look almost backward.

I remain impressed by the civility, hospitality, respect, and caring that we’ve encountered from the vast majority of people we’ve met. And I do hope that at least a few of them will come visit us in the U.S. so we can return that hospitality.

If we ever do return (and if David and Daniel have any say that will happen some day), I’ll need to study Japanese language a lot more. I remain surprised by how few Japanese people speak English, and how even fewer speak it well. The expectation is that foreigners in the country speak Japanese, which wasn’t always the case. When David was last here more than twenty years ago, he said Japanese people believed their language was too difficult for foreigners to learn, and were impressed and grateful for even an “arigato” (thank you). But that’s absolutely not true anymore, at least in not Tokyo. When I have interactions with Japanese people, whether it’s in a store or at a social gathering, it’s assumed that I speak the language. Outside of Tokyo people still seem surprised to hear David speak Japanese, or even for me to stumble along with my bits and pieces. But clearly in the last two decades many foreigners have moved to Tokyo and learned to speak Japanese. I’m managing better than I was four months ago, but I have a long way to go before I’m even comfortably conversational. But that’s a challenge for our next visit. . .

So sayonara Japan, at least for now. And I’ll see all of you at home soon. Th, th, th, that’s all, folks!